Embracing Faith, Unity, and Consultation: Forging My Future Law Practice

Losing my father was an indescribable loss, leaving me hurt, confused, and incomplete. However, through faith, I discovered a newfound resilience—a source of strength that has guided me through the darkest days. It has helped me persevere and navigate the obstacles and challenges that arose as a result of losing him during a time when I needed him most. Faith, as the Bible scripture describes it, is "the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen." With faith as my foundation, I have learned to embrace the unknown and trust in the journey ahead.

In the aftermath of my father's passing, I realized that my purpose had long been intertwined with seeking his approval. I recall the early days when a simple baseball glove became the gateway to his pride and joy. As a young child, I strived to excel in the sport not only for my own enjoyment but also to bring him the happiness he deserved. However, as I grew older, my purpose shifted as my father introduced me to the concept of the "Ivy League" during an evening in my grandparent's library. His aspirations for me to attend such a prestigious institution fueled my dedication to academic excellence, leading me to sacrifice my beloved sport and immerse myself in scholarly pursuits. Arriving on Columbia's campus, I had hoped that achieving my father's aspirations would bring closure and a sense of fulfillment. Yet, the emptiness within me remained, leaving me adrift, devoid of true direction or purpose. It was during this tumultuous period that I began to reshape my perspective. I realized that my father's love was never conditioned upon my accomplishments or the positions I held. Instead, he wished for me to find pride in the work I accomplished and to live a life of purpose.

Guided by faith, I embarked on a new purpose—an evolving pathway that is shaping my future law practice. Central to this vision is the notion of finding unity in difference. I firmly believe that diversity, in all its forms, holds the key to transformative change. To bridge divides and foster collaboration, I aim to create an environment where individuals from diverse backgrounds, perspectives, and disciplines can work together towards common goals. This skill will be immensely vital and useful considering the increase in polarization between individuals, groups, and interest groups.

Leading from the middle will be the cornerstone of my approach. It involves harnessing the power of shared values and common ground to inspire collective action. By helping individuals recognize what they have in common, I aim to break down barriers and empower them to believe in their abilities to effect change. I envision myself as a facilitator, encouraging open dialogue, collaboration, and understanding among disparate parties.

Hi Triston! First off, I am so sorry for your loss. I have found that the big dates tend to be the most challenging, and though everyone's experience of losing a parent is different, I know it's hard. My mom and I would have celebrated her birthday a few days ago were she still here, and it hits me in ways I can't describe every year. She and I had a complicated relationship (and she was also a main part of one of my essays for this course), and though I have worked tirelessly to manage its impact on me over the years, occasionally I still question whether I am chasing goals for myself in the here and now or in an attempt to be a son who would make her proud. That said, I've really enjoyed becoming closer friends with you over the course of the semester, and I feel I could learn a lot from reading about how your experience would shape your practice in the event that's the direction you take your next draft. Thanks for sharing.

-Michael

There are two routes to improvement in revision. We can make the writing better by removing lots of words. Because some of the ideas here are so important to you, you say them frequently. Every redundant word should go, and every sentence, too. The reader cannot face your experience as you have done, so you have to write about it tautly, for the reader's attention, which is differently organized.

We can make the substance more valuable to you by turning from the past to the future. You are now at a new beginning, your writing says, in which the goals of your practice are your happiness and helpfulness to others, not pleasing or living up to your father's expectations. In this sense, having come through mourning, you are now entering law school. But you have a year's learning already under you, so the process of revision now involves seeking out a more specific idea of what you intend to do, where, with whom, and how much you need in order to sustain that practice and that life. Time to get out the crayon and start drawing on the wall.

Blind Faith

-- By TristonFerguson - 14 Apr 2023

“You cannot have the good without the bad, otherwise you will not have an appreciation for the good or the bad.” February 4th marked the one-year anniversary, and I am still grieving. The compass that once subconsciously guided my life, more importantly, my career aspirations has disappeared from the Earth and did not leave any advice or guidance for me to follow. I remain hurt, incomplete, confused, and distraught. However, a new feeling has slowly creeped into my grieving process and has assisted me in remaining hopeful. The feeling is a source of strength that helps me persevere when faced with obstacles and challenges that are a direct result of losing my father at a time when I needed him the absolute most. Bible scripture defines the phenomenon as, “the substance of things hoped for and the evidence for things not seen.” The foundation of my life is no longer dependent on the approval of my father. I now and forever will function and operate from a place of faith.

The morning I found out my father passed away exists as an intangible moment that I would frequently revisit when I would seek closure. I thought that revisiting the moment would give me a sense of closure that I so desperately desired. However, the desire to heal and move forward required that I dissect the relationship I had with my father and the substance that the relationship consisted of. This could not be done by revisiting a moment in which he was no longer present.

For years, my purpose was consumed with pleasing others, primarily my father. I would imagine the day that I could afford to offer him the quality of life that I felt he so desperately deserved. The desire to please my father dedicated nearly every aspect of my life. The earliest example of this came at the age of five when he gave me my first baseball glove. At that moment, baseball became a significant part of my identity. And while I enjoyed the sport, I simply wanted my father to be proud that I was engaged in an activity that brought him a significant amount of joy. I had faith that if my father saw me playing the sport he loved growing up, I would feel like I served my purpose as a son. However, it became clear in my mid-teens that playing baseball simply was not enough. One evening, in my grandparent’s library, my father opened an encyclopedia and showed me the term “Ivy League.” He told me that he wanted me to get there because “that’s where the smartest kids go and become successful.” He reminded me of his desire to attend such an institution whenever possible. Eventually, my purpose as a son quickly shifted from being the best shortstop and left fielder to the best student I could possibly be. I joined every club I could, participated in academic-oriented extracurricular activities, and, more importantly, I gave up the sport I had known for over a decade to pursue a more scholarly set of goals in hopes of further pleasing my father. My scholarly focus shifted me to speech and debate during my junior and senior year of high school.

When I first stepped foot on Columbia’s campus, the emptiness I felt inside myself had remained. I still longed for my father’s approval even after achieving what I thought would make him the happiest. Without him physically with me, I was left confused, hurt, and without a true sense of direction or purpose. This had a significant impact on my mental health and left me with a feeling of emptiness that could not be filled. However, with every passing day, along with the feeling of hurt, confusion, and anxiety, I developed a feeling of hope that was rooted in my understanding of faith. My new hope was to discover myself outside of the parameters established by my father and to do so faithfully. I went into law school wanting to practice corporate law with the hope of being able to one day become a partner. However, I was never able to articulate a real concrete reason as to why I wanted to subject myself to practicing a type of law that brought me no real joy. My answer was always rooted in my desire to provide my family with an exceptional quality of life. Simply put, if I were rich and was of high status or importance, then my father would have to accept me, and I could in turn fulfill my father’s desire. However, I have come to learn that my father’s love was never conditioned on my ability to hold a particular position, but rather to simply be proud of the work that I accomplish. Even though he never expressed it, I have faith that I can accept this assumption to be analogous to what my father would have said to me if presented with the opportunity. The passing of my father not only marks the end to our relationship on Earth, but also the beginning of our relationship with him purely in my heart. This time however, I am operating blindly with faith serving as my compass. Faith is the substance of things hoped for, and the evidence of things not seen. I am hopeful that my faith will not guide me down a path to pursue perfection or approval, but to simply be happy and help others.

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